Sabrina Teiger, M.A.

~ Trinity of our Nature ~

Blessed 2012!

It’s nice to connect with you all in this New Year. 

I am putting together an 8 week course on Prosperity for my Yoga Teacher Training course and have come across some thought provoking quotes in the process.  Here is one of them as written by Yogi Bhajan, the Master of Kundalini Yoga.

“In life, there’s one unison body.  Wherever we are-we are one.  We have not forgotten that in us there are three values: we are angels, we are humans and we are animals.  Our barbaric animal nature is to live AT each other.  Our human nature is to live WITH each other.  And our angelic nature is to live FOR each other.  That should decide all our behavioral aspects.  Whenever you decide to deal with somebody, ask yourself, ‘Am I an angel? Am I going to do it angelically?  Am I doing it humanly? Am I going to be a brute - barbaric and neurotic?’”

What I love about this is that it reinforces the concept of conscious choice!  In each moment, in each situation, with each person, I have a choice.  How do I want to be?  How do I want to relate to this person?  It speaks to the importance of pausing before reacting and bringing oneself present.  I know this is not always easy and sometimes seems impossible.

I came out of my teacher training this past weekend feeling blissful and connected but tired.  I went home and read my emails only to receive a “bomb” of sorts that brought me right back down into a totally different frequency.  After all the work I did over the weekend physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually, I reacted.  And my reaction was taken out of context and only enraged the other person, spiraling the entire situation out of control.   Even though I could hear my “angelic voice” telling me how to write the email response, my animal nature got triggered and it was stronger in that moment.  It took me two days to release it and be able to speak to the person about the situation from a more human nature and another day to move into my angelic nature. 

I so wanted to be neutral about it.  I was so upset at myself for reacting instead of taking the high road.  I needed to practice a lot of self-forgiveness and give myself the time to work through it.  I know I am not an animal but sometimes I behave like one. I may or may not be an angel, but often behave like one.  I know I do my best as a human to live with others but even that can be challenging.    

What I appreciate about having these tools, or this wisdom is that I know that wherever I am with the situation is part of my growth.  Being able to witness or having the awareness of myself and my behavior is what eventually enables me to uplift and connect in a higher, more neutral place both with myself and others. 

Speaking about tools, I am learning that my breath is the one factor that can help bring my awareness to the fact that I have a choice.  When faced with a challenging situation or person, the best way to help myself is to breathe long and deep, to actually take a minute or 3 if you have the time and count my breath by inhaling for 5 or 8 or 10 and then exhaling for the same count.  Even better, inhale for 5, hold it for 5, exhale for 5 and hold it out for 5.  The definition of calmness is that the inhale and the exhale are equal.  Try it and see if that works for you. 

The reason I felt called to share this with you today, is that for me, having the awareness that we have different aspects of ourselves is a gift.  And loving ourselves no matter which nature we are exhibiting is the most important! 

As we become more aware and more loving, we connect with our true nature, our essence and in that place, we experience abundance and prosperity.

Many blessings to you all as you navigate through this New Year.  May you each know your bounty!

~ Alignment ~

I went to work with an alignment specialist yesterday.  I have been having some lower back issues and wanted some help with them.  My session with Guru Prem was enlightening and very healing.  In addition to working on my spine and helping me understand the effects of how I stand, and more importantly, how I breathe, we talked about my name.

He asked me what my name was and then asked me what it meant.  I know what my name means as I have shared the story behind it many times.  It is something I do each year with my students when we first sit in community circle together.  If they don’t know what their names mean, I have them ask their parents and then share the story of their name when we meet again. 

How many of you know or remember what your name means?  How many of you think about your name or have any kind of relationship with it? 

If you think about it, our name is something we hear and respond to multiple times a day.  It is what we are identified by in this physical world.  Guru Prem explained to me how important it is to have a positive relationship with one’s name.  It is an energetic, a field around us.   Imagine if every time you heard your name, it helped bring you into alignment with something valuable.   Imagine if it helped bring you present to yourself, to your truth.

One of the ways to build a relationship with your name is to create an anagram out of it.  Do you remember playing around with those when we were younger?  I loved doing that and often do that for friends or my children when making birthday cards for them.  Take each letter and make a word that resonates with you about yourself out of it.  Do that for each letter and then read over it.  You could even be creative and turn it into an art project and put it somewhere that you see each morning. 

When Guru Prem asked me what my name meant, he then asked me what quality or qualities I thought would help me embody my name.  For example, my name means “Princess.”  I associate being a Princess with the quality of Grace.  So, he encouraged me to make an anagram out of the word “Grace.”  The one that he used as an example was:

Grounded        Relaxed                        Aligned           Connected       Ease

This is another creative way to connect with the energy of a name and align with your truth.

If you don’t like your name or have never resonated with it, this might be a wonderful way to connect with it in a different way.

As I’m reading over this, I realize that I started this piece with going to see an “alignment” specialist.  I went to see him for a physical issue, but if I think about it, I needed to align myself on many levels.  He gave me the gift of physical alignment but also the gift of energetic alignment. 

He helped me to further understand the importance of being in alignment with what I do and who I am and aligning with my name and its meaning was a brilliant and easy way to do that. 

I firmly believe that everything we need on this journey is within us and our name is a part of that.  As time is moving faster and we have more things to do, it is so important to ground ourselves in one way or another.  Grounding into your name or what it means to you or how it expresses your truth can be very healing!

So, I invite you to play with this, to bring out the creative aspect of you and joyfully align with the truth of who you are through your name.

I am grateful for each and every one of you and how you have touched my life.  Happy Holidays to all!  May you be abundantly blessed and filled with magic and delight!

             Y  Sacred    Authentic   Bountiful    Radiant    Intuitive     Natural    Aligned

~Death ~

Over the past week, two Canfield Elementary school fathers passed away suddenly and unexpectedly.  Both of them were young dads with young children and loving wives.   There are often no words to accompany news like this.  Whether or not we knew them personally, many of us are going through our own grieving process alongside their families.

As much as we know that death is a part of this life experience, losing someone is never easy and speaking about it openly seems to be challenging for some.  What I do know is that death affects each one of us in very personal ways.  Hearing about the loss of someone in your community may bring about memories of your own experience with losing a loved one.  For those who haven’t yet lost someone close to them, it may bring about fears of the possibility of losing someone you love. 

I have lost many people in my life, some quickly and unexpectedly and others after prolonged illness.  Either way, the loss has been significant and even though I still feel their presence in my life and know they are around me, it’s not the same as having them here, touching them, hugging them, calling them up and hearing their voices on the other end of the line. 

My husband and I went on a trip to Italy over the summer.  While I was on the flight over the Atlantic, I went into this irrational panic for a few minutes amidst the turbulence thinking, what am I doing putting my life in this pilot’s hands and flying over the ocean while my three precious children are at home?????  What would happen to them if something happened to both Douglas and I????  I wrestled with this inside myself throughout the flight, talking to myself, really listening to the part that was in fear and ultimately calming myself down.  I was amazed that even me, Miss I believe that what is meant to be will be and that all is what it is, threw that out the window when it came to the possibility of me leaving my children motherless…. 

Fear can be overpowering at times, especially when we are faced with the truth that ultimately we don’t have control over our lives ~ we don’t have control over when or how we die.  This truth can either put us in a frenzy or be a teacher about gratitude, acceptance and living each moment for the gift that it is.

When I found out about LK (the second father) I sat down with each one of my kids individually and talked to them about it.  I shared with them how experiences like this remind me how important it is to leave nothing left unsaid; how important it is to be grateful for each day we have together; how important it is to be grateful for our health.  I told each one how much I loved them and that if something like that should ever happen suddenly that I would always be there with them, loving them, supporting them, watching over them.  It wasn’t an easy conversation and it brought up a lot of emotion from us both but it felt important to me to leave nothing left unsaid.

Why am I writing about this today?  Death is a sacred moment.  It is a moment that brings up so much in each one of us.  It is a moment where we can experience destruction and it is a moment where we can experience love.  It is a moment where we can feel alone and it is a moment where we can feel embraced and supported.  It is a moment where we can feel lost and it is a moment where we can feel found.

Every day that I wake up with my children and my husband and my family around me is a gift, a gift that I cherish and experiencing this closeness to death through my community has reminded me of this precious truth. 

I kept hearing this line from a poem by David Whyte which says: “Revelation must be terrible with no time left to say goodbye.”  Share yourself with others today, in this now moment, for this moment is all we can be sure of!

I invite you to take some time today to let the people in your life who matter to you know how you feel about them.  I invite you to take a moment and go inside your heart and find that which connects you to your source so that you can be a wellspring of strength and loving for yourself as well as for others.

I am deeply grateful for all the people in my life who contribute to its fullness.

Thank you all and God Bless you all!!!

~ Sharing Myself ~

I was having dinner with a new-found friend who asked me what kind of work I do with people.  It amazes me how often that question throws me off for as much as I love what I do, I find it difficult to explain.  I realize that I’m attempting to tailor what I’m about to share to the person I’m speaking to so that they will understand, rather than just simply sharing it.    That thought speaks volumes to me about my inner process, and I am realizing that, in a way, what I am doing is judging the person I am with.  I am judging where they are and whether or not they will understand or resonate with me and what I have to share.   And in judging them, what I am really doing is judging myself.  Wow!  

It seems that this pattern or process has been something that has been with me most of my life ~ and I know where it came from.  It came from the part of me that felt my worth was based on how others perceived me.  It came from empowering others to determine whether I was accepted, valued, liked or ok and those things determined whether I was “in” or not.  My adolescent is so present with me right now!!!  As much work as I’ve done in this area, there is still a part of me that wants to be “accepted” by everyone.  So what I do is I look at someone and if perceive in any way that we are different or feel threatened because of my own self-worth issues, I automatically decide they won’t like me or won’t get me and get all mumbo jumbo with my words.   I understand that it’s a form of protection, but what really saddens me is that I am missing out on meeting and befriending so many different kinds of people.   And, I’m stopping myself from sharing myself, which is what I really want to do.

It’s like I want to reach out and share myself freely, but there is someone inside freaking out about doing that so she tells me all kinds of stories about why they won’t like me or understand me.  More often than not, I have listened to her ~ because I wasn’t aware that this was happening until now.

The beauty of the work I do with others is in bringing consciousness to the unconscious parts of themselves through listening and trusting my intuition.  Said in another way, I assist people in bringing to light habits, patterns, behaviors, or ways of being that they enact over and over again without being aware of them because they are unconscious to them.   Here, I am doing that very process with myself J 

And the power of bringing consciousness to that which is unconscious is that through awareness, we have the power to change.

It is impossible to change that which we are unaware of both in ourselves and in the world.  So many people take on an issue when they want to make a difference in the world ~ be it in politics, healthcare, hunger, peace, education, etc.  People take on these issues when they become aware of the impacts of them on their lives, or the lives of people they love.  Doing this inside of ourselves is no different.  If we want to “be the change we want to see in the world” this work begins within our own consciousness.

My invitation to you is to check in and see if there are ways that you show up in your life that seem out of context with who you are.  More often than not, there is a younger part of yourself who is hurting and wanting to be held, loved and cared for.  More often than not, there is a belief that the younger one inside is holding about him/herself that is standing in the way of you moving forward.  Working with that belief and applying loving to the parts inside that are hurting is powerful medicine and very liberating!!!

I am very aware that there is a younger part inside of me who still thinks we are in high school, who is still very much afraid that there is something wrong with her and who still wants so very much to belong.    She needs a lot of loving and encouragement, and I intend to work with her in service to liberating myself from these old patterns and giving myself permission to share myself freely with others.

~ Questing ~

Happy Spring! 

I started working on a Questing Shield with my second graders yesterday.  This is something I have done before with 6^th and 8^th graders but thought I would change things a little and work with the younger ones on it.  Basically, they are given the chance to explore themselves through a series of questions and then create a shield by symbolizing the answers to their questions on different sections of the shield.    

I came into the class yesterday and showed them the shield and asked them if they knew what a “quest” was.  Some of their answers were: it’s a trip, an adventure, somewhere you go to find a treasure.   These kids are so precious!  Wise beyond their knowing!!!   We spent time talking about their thoughts and about the adventure we were going to take together in putting together their own Questing Shield. 

The shield is a wonderful tool to invite exploration into oneself and to capture a space in time that is reflective of where one is on his/her journey.  Most of the questions that the children are asked to think about when putting this together have to do with qualities ~ qualities they see and like in others, qualities they like in themselves and qualities they would like to acquire or strengthen within themselves.   The questions truly reflect the importance of the person taking the journey or quest rather than the quest itself.  

When I think about the adventures we read about or watch on film, like the quest for the Holy Grail or Indiana Jones, we are delighted by the adventure that our hero/heroine faces as they continue forward but often unaware of the inner journey that is taking place.

I explained to them that while often times it appears that someone goes on a quest to find something outside of him/herself, the actual journey of the quest is about finding a treasure within yourself that you didn’t know was there before.  

Quests can last an hour, a lifetime or anywhere in between the two.  For example, I may spend my entire life looking for my true purpose or I may take on a meditation practice for 40 days.  A quest isn’t necessarily determined by duration, but is through intention!  As one of my yoga teachers says before each class, “You will walk out of here a different person than you came in.” That is true for any quest of any length! 

The questions that come forward from the exercise are powerful in that they invite one into the exploration of the qualities one might need to take with them or have inside them, when they take on a quest.  For each person and each quest, those qualities may change.  Sometimes one needs courage and steadfastness.  Other times, one might need gentle, loving, kindness and compassion. 

What I love about this exercise is the tremendous power that is available to us when we choose to walk into something consciously.   Imagine what a journey, no matter how long or short, would be like if we took a moment to go inside and reflect upon the qualities we might need to help us through, or the qualities that we want to strengthen inside of ourselves by taking the journey.    Imagine choosing to go on a quest just for the sake of exploring a quality that you want to experience or enhance, one that you don’t feel you embody yet.  Powerful!  It can be as simple as saying “My intention is to truly embrace patience,” when you realize you have to wait in a long line somewhere, remembering that who you are and who you will be at the end of that hour will be different. 

Again, for me, bringing consciousness to what I do is the foundation of growth, expansion and discovery of truth.

And so, I invite you to take a moment today and think of a quality that you would like to strengthen or enhance.  Find a situation where you can bring the consciousness of the quest to it and see what happens.

May your personal quests throughout your day or your life be embraced with grace and acceptance!

If you are interested in creating your own Questing Shield, email me and I will send you the questions and the templates.

             Y  Sabrina

~ Truth ~

Sat Nam ~ Truth is my Identity

I have been practicing Kundalini Yoga for the past few months and am loving every aspect of it.  Kundalini beautifully activates and engages me on all levels: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and even the unconscious.  It has been such a gift in my life!!

This morning as I was walking, I was thinking about the words we use to begin and end each class.  We say, “Sat Nam” which means “Truth is my Identity.”

In my practice as an Intuitive Guide/Facilitator, I speak often about the concept of “Truth/truth.”   I feel that what we hold in our consciousness is what we believe to be true about ourselves.  However, for me there are two types of “truth.”  There is the “Truth” of who we are, our soul’s essence, and there is the “truth” that we have come to believe about ourselves based on our life experience and our belief systems, regardless of where they come from.  I differentiate them by using a capital “T” when I’m speaking about our essence and a little “t” when speaking about the truths created through our mind/beliefs.

Think about what you believe to be “true” about yourself.  See how many of those “truths” come from things people have told you about yourself or things you believe to be true based on your culture, your religion, your background, family, etc.  These “truths” can make us feel great about ourselves and can also make us feel miserable about ourselves.   They vacillate and often are the cause of shifts in our energy or mood.   These “truths” often come across as righteous and judgmental if not of ourselves, of others.   When we identify ourselves with these “truths” we tend to separate and contract rather than connect and expand.

The “Truth” of who we are connects and expands us.  It is unwavering.  Its energy is neutral.  It feels like home.  It just is.

When I sit in the “Truth” of who I am, I feel free.  And in this place, I am able to clearly look at all of the “truths” I have imprisoned myself by.  I have the opportunity to look at how I’ve separated myself from others because of these “truths.”    I have the opportunity to look at the belief systems inside my consciousness that have created these “truths” and change them.   How?  By questioning them rather than just accepting them.  By going through the “belief” drawer in my mind and releasing those that don’t serve me any longer and updating them to align with where I am now.

It’s kind of like spring cleaning ~ out with the old, in with the new ~ allowing the fresh scented air in to clean out the cobwebs.

We have the power to change our beliefs and the best way to do this is to sit for a moment in the “Truth” of who we are and ask from that space what serves us and what doesn’t.  It is in that heart space, that we have perfect clarity, perfect knowing, perfect loving.

I invite you into the exploration of your “truths” by experiencing your “Truth”, your essence and allowing the “Truth” of your Identity to lead you on.

Sat Nam

~ Paralysis ~

I have had several dreams over the past few weeks in which I find myself or parts of myself unable to move.  Interestingly enough, it is always around forward motion.  In the dream, I can feel myself trying to, wanting to, willing myself to lift my arms or my legs to move where I need to go and them not moving at all, and I’m not understanding why.  I can see where I need to grab or step and it is so close yet each movement seems impossible, and I feel completely paralyzed. 

For me there comes a tremendous fear along with feeling paralyzed.  In fact, when I think about the dreams, I am always fighting the paralysis ~ I’ve never surrendered to it ~ never thought of that until this moment.  I find myself using all my strength, mentally and physically, practically forcing myself to move and I can’t.   I feel powerless and that is very scary for me in the dream and upon awakening such that I wake up distressed and can feel the weight of the paralysis in my limbs.  Immediately, upon awakening from the dream, regardless of the time, I find myself moving my arms and legs, fingers and toes to make sure they still work and clear myself energetically from the dream. 

But this morning’s dream, or at least the energy from the dream is still very present with me and so I’m choosing to explore it here as there appears to be a message meant for many through this.

In my women’s group on Sunday, we talked a lot about the differences between power and force.  In the dreams, I find myself forcing myself to move with no success.  And as I write this, I am called to bring forward some excerpts from David Hawkin’s book Power vs. Force.

“Power is that which supports the significance of life itself.  It is noble.  Force is crass.  Power uplifts, dignifies and ennobles.   Force must always be justified.  Power is whole; force is partial.  Force is a movement that goes from here to there (or tries to) in opposition to something.  Power is still.  Force always moves against something, whereas power doesn’t move against anything at all.  Force is incomplete and needs to be fed energy constantly.  Power is total and complete in and of itself.  Force has an insatiable appetite and constantly consumes.  Power energizes, gives forth, supplies and supports.  Power is associated with compassion. Force with judgment.  Force is concrete, literal and arguable, requiring proof and support.  Power is self-evident, it just is.  Force has transient goals.  Power motivates us endlessly.”

I am fighting the paralysis with force.   What would happen if I surrendered to it?  What is the metaphor for me here?  If I am fighting what is, forcing it to be different because I think it should be or I want it to be, I’m not getting anywhere.  How do I do this in my daily life ~ fight what is?  Fighting takes a lot of energy and that energy doesn’t always propel me forward ~ in fact it might push me backward.  When I fight to have things go my way, it’s me saying I know better, best as a matter of fact, and I’m going to direct this life, this situation, this experience. 

I know many people who believe this to be true ~that they are the ones in control of their lives and if they don’t take action in making things go the way they want them to go then who will???

Surrendering to what is, takes tremendous courage.  Surrendering to what is, allows the co-creative flow of life to guide you.  Surrendering says, ok Spirit, I may not understand why this is happening but I trust the feedback I am getting and am releasing my attachment to it.  True power lies in the acceptance of what is ~ trusting the flow of energy to guide you in a way that is supportive, sustaining, energizing, and loving.

The opportunity in this exploration seems to be to take a look at the places in my life, where I am forcing rather than allowing, trusting, surrendering.  Another opportunity here is to look at my relationship to life ~ do I believe that I am in control and it is up to me to direct my life experiences or do I believe that I am in a co-creative partnership with a higher power/consciousness that loves and supports me in every way?   

For me personally, I know that I am in a co-creative relationship with Spirit and am so grateful that I am connected to something greater than myself which has a higher perspective on things and out of deep love for me, guides me to what is for my highest good.  However, there are parts of me that still want to direct/control my life, that don’t believe this to be true and that is what is coming through in the dreams.  My choice then is to embrace those parts by listening to them, loving them and showing them that there is another way.  My choice here is to continue to surrender, in loving, even to the paralysis, for it is a great messenger.

~ Self-Love ~

Valentine’s Day is approaching.  It is deemed the holiday of love; the day where we take the time to acknowledge the love in our life; to offer thoughts and sentiments of loving and gratitude to those who are special to us in our lives.    Guess what ~ you are a special gift to yourself everyday!!!!!!

This Valentine’s Day, I offer an invitation to you.  Celebrate YOURSELF!!  Send yourself a Valentine’s day card/love letter; treat yourself to your favorite sweet; luxuriate in a bath filled with rose petals or fresh eucalyptus leaves; schedule a facial, a massage, a mani/pedi, a professional shave; go out and buy yourself a bouquet of flowers and place them in a beautiful vase on your table; sit in the sun and let it’s light and warmth kiss your face a thousand times; hug yourself and offer gratitude to yourself and the many ways you show up for yourself every day; look at yourself in the mirror and smile; make a joy list and complete one item on that list today; get a make-up pencil and draw little hearts all over your body or just in one special place that makes you giggle when you think of it being there J

It may be that you just commit to loving yourself no matter what happens all day long……because you can!!!

Love is an act but it is also a state of being.  When you love yourself, you engage in both a giving and receiving practice ~ which enhances your state of loving.  It’s a delicious circle.  The truth is, the more you love yourself, the more love you have to give to others!!!

The more of us that engage in this practice on a daily basis, the more peaceful and radiant this life experience will become!  So, why not start this year with something new and turn this Valentine’s Day into a “share my love for myself day.” 

Remember, you are LOVE.  LOVE is your essence.  It is in every cell of your being and the more you cultivate it within yourself, the more you will experience it outside of yourself.

You are magnificent!  Each and every one of you!!!!  Celebrate your majesty!

Happy Happy “Share Your Love with Yourself Valentine’s Day!!!!!”

Watch this precious one ~ she’s got the idea down pat!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1MY7KURim0&feature=player_embedded

~Community ~

Together we can create a circle; together we can sit side by side.  Together we can create a circle; together we can sit side by side.  I’m so glad. I’m so glad.  Together we can play, learn, and grow.  I’m so glad.  I’m so glad.  Together we can play, learn, and grow.

This is a song I sing with my kindergarteners each Wednesday morning before we begin our circle.  I am reminded of this song as I sit here thinking about the circle of women I facilitated in my home on Sunday.  I leaned into what my heart was called to do and invited a circle to form, trusting that whoever was meant to participate, would say “yes.” 

For me, a circle is a symbol of community ~ a shape that has no ending and no beginning ~ a shape that is formed by consciously choosing into it ~ a shape that is created by the coming together of more than one.  Communities are created for all kinds of reasons but underneath it all, is the heart’s desire to sit with those who share a common truth.  There is tremendous power that is available when two or more are gathered with a common intention.  That intention can be as simple as sitting and breathing together or as complex as coming together to solve a conflict be it personal or global.

When I speak about power here, I am speaking about the energy that is available to us to help us recharge.  It’s kind of like how an electric car needs to plug into a source of power in order to be able to work again.  For many, plugging in/connecting to something that helps them remember who they are gives them the power not only to continue on but to thrive!!! 

I have spoken before about the importance of connection.  That as energetic beings, we need to recharge and in order to do so, we need to connect into something that will recharge us.  For some it is walking in nature; for others it is meditating or just sitting quietly and breathing; for some it is through sharing our truth with another; being vulnerable and opening to receiving.  While we know this to be true, I am just realizing that in order to recharge ~ we need to be open to receive the charge…..

That seems to be the challenging part!!  One of the questions I have asked in the past is this: what would it feel like if we loved/cared for ourselves as much as we loved/cared for others?  That comes into play here ~ for if we did, we would see the inherent need for us to find what energizes us and then open to receive the charge by saying “yes.”  Yes to the walk. Yes to the breath.  Yes to the meditation.  Yes to the class or the lecture or the quiet time.  Yes to playing the guitar or singing a song.  Yes to dance.  Yes to being creative.  Yes to taking a risk.  Yes to writing the book.  Yes to the circle and on and on and on.  Yes to being seen by yourself first!

So, in coming full circle, it seems that when sitting together, we are saying “yes.”  Yes to sharing ourselves.  Yes to being seen.  Yes to receiving.  And, the beauty of doing this in the sacred communion of others is that they act as a mirror and a witness.  As a mirror, we each reflect back to one another our wholeness, our loving, our truth.  As a witness, we are given the sacred opportunity to observe one another blossom and expand.

In the end, we are all the beneficiaries, for saying “yes” has a powerful rippling effect on many levels. 

~ Should  ~

"Today may there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you remember the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are.”

Happy Blessed New Year Everyone!!   I received this quote in my inbox this morning.  I truly loved the quote and thought to myself, what a wonderful quote to start the New Year off with!  This is one of those quotes that can be read each morning as a beautiful reminder of who we are.

I have found myself to be in a “Should” state since the year began.  I’m not sure why exactly, it just is what is.  When I read the second line: “may you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be” it really spoke to me.

I often wonder where this “Should” voice comes from.  I have an intimate relationship with her.  I have dialogued with her in my book and many times since, yet she is an energy that seems to be by my side all too often.  When I sit back and reflect upon her, I realize that so often I get caught up in life and the daily grind that I fall prey to it and often become victim to it.  What I mean by that is that I seem to fall into a fog of forgetfulness and falsely buy into the fact that I am obligated to do this and that and really don’t have a choice about it.

I was speaking to my “god-daughter” who is 17.  She is taking a couple of AP courses and plays full time soccer.  She was telling me how overwhelmed she was with school and sports and just wanted to stop.  We talked about her situation, and I asked her if she felt she had a choice.  It was interesting to talk to her about it because on the one hand, I don’t think she ever thought about that ~ she was just doing what she was doing.

How often do you feel that way?  That you are just doing what you do each and every day?  I know that I do quite often.  Without realizing it, I get onto what I consider the hamster wheel of forgetfulness and find myself tired and resentful more than empowered and joyful.  Why????  Because I forget I have a choice ~ I always have a choice. 

“Should” is a great reminder of choice.  She can actually, if I am awake enough, be considered a great messenger.  What I mean by that, is that if I fall prey to the “Should,” I am allowing myself to be led, almost blindly following a voice  and empowering that voice regardless of where it comes from to tell me what to do or which way to go.  However, when I realize that this is what is happening, I have the opportunity to catch myself, take pause and say, “wait a minute.  I have a choice here.”

We always have choices, but making choices is not always easy.   Sometimes, we believe that keeping things the way they are is easier than facing the consequences of making a different choice.  Sometimes, we are all too worried about how our choices will affect others.  Sometimes, we would rather continue on the hamster wheel of forgetfulness because making a different choice throws us into something unknown or different.

Regardless of what we fear to be true, the truth is, in every situation we have choice.    I believe this is one of the most empowering qualities of the human experience; one that is often neglected due to fear.  I totally understand that as I often want to forget I have a choice because I’m afraid of making it.  And as I write that and admit it, I find myself saddened because what that tells me about me is that I still have a part of me that is afraid of how my choices will affect others, such that I forsake myself in the process.

So, my intention for this coming year is to empower myself to make more conscious choices; to love myself when I’m afraid of the consequences; and to dare to free myself of the chains of external validation.

I invite you to look at your life and see if there are places where you can empower yourself to make new choices ~ or to be willing to admit that you do have a choice ~ and if not yet ready to make those choices, that you love yourself anyway ~ knowing that where you are is exactly where you are meant to be.

       Y  Sabrina

~ Bullying ~

I just got off the phone with a mom who wanted to talk to me about something that was happening between her son and my son at school.  It appears as if, when together with another friend, he often becomes mean spirited.  After listening to the situation, I shared with her that, in a way, it seems to be a mild form of bullying~ one that doesn’t seem to be intentional in nature but still bullying none-the-less.  We talked for a while about it, agreeing that it is important to open the lines of communication between all three boys and give them each a chance to share as well as to hear one another. 

There is a fine line between joking around and being mean.  Either way, the person on the receiving end, more often than not, gets hurt or feels hurt emotionally.  How do we teach our children that something that seems innocent to them, may be very hurtful to another?  It is challenging to get children to imagine walking in the shoes of another ~ to really learn empathy and compassion ~ but it’s such an important tool/skill to teach them early on. 

This situation got me thinking about the concept of bullying.  How many of us would be willing to admit that we bully ourselves on a daily basis if not several times a day?  I have heard it said that I am my own worst critic, but isn’t it pretty much the same thing?   How often do we hear the voices in our own heads tell us that we are not this, or not that; that we don’t have what it takes, that we are weak, that we are not enough ~ not pretty enough, not smart enough, not thin enough, not rich enough, not working hard enough, and on and on.  I consider that to be a form of bullying, and if we want to see it stop in the world around us, we need to start with ourselves!

I often wonder why it seems to be so much easier to be negative or mean than it is to be positive and loving?!  I know that this paradigm is changing for many of us who are doing work in consciousness, but for the majority of people out there, that is not the case.  Knowing that it is not our job to change others, how do we continue to work with ourselves so that we can model this shift for others; so that we can compassionately understand the challenges so many face around this issue and love them anyway?    As a parent we learn that often children are hungry for attention and will get it any way they can – through negative behavior as well as positive behaviors because any attention is better than none at all.  Is that the case within ourselves too?  Are we hungry for attention and this is our way of getting it one way or another????

 I do believe that this world is hungry for love, for loving and would do anything to get it, to feel it.

Sometimes, I want to stand on a rooftop and yell to all that can hear, that the love we are seeking outside of ourselves is within us.  I know it is not my job or my responsibility to bring others to that remembering ~ but a part of me wants to!

So, the most important thing I can do is honor that desire to share what I know to be true by living it with each breath and bringing that truth wherever I go ~ to be of humble service in this way.

Those of us who are doing the work in consciousness, who are living in this new paradigm, have an opportunity to share what we know by living it inside ourselves!  What that looks like or feels like or expresses as for each person is unique, however, what is universal is that we are loving beings who have everything we need inside of ourselves.  We, each one of us, are whole and complete!

Imagine a world where everyone really knew that and if they forgot for a moment, they would have a magnificent mirror right in front of them wherever they went reminding them so.

I am grateful to know who I am and hope that during this holiday season and beyond you tap into that reservoir of loving that is you and share it with yourself and others who come your way.

Abundant Blessings and Joyous Gratitude to you all.  May your Holiday season and New Year be filled with delicious and delightful miracles!

~ Gratitude ~

I led my second grade class in a circle of gratitude yesterday.  It was a chance for them to think of one person and one thing in their lives they were grateful for.  It was precious to hear some of their answers ~ some were grateful for family members, other for Star Wars screen writers, some for toys, some for Love and some for God.   It is always such an honor to listen to them and their desire to share themselves.

What I was really present to was the concept of being grateful for what we have now.  It often seems that we think about what we want in our lives or what is missing in our lives… “if I only had this, then….” “if I could just do this, then….”  instead of what we already have. 

I am not saying that it’s not ok to want things.  Wanting things can often be a motivator to grow, and to expand.  I often find that when I think about what I don’t have, I get stuck in the energy of lack and when I take the time to be grateful for what I do have or who I am, movement seems to come naturally.

One of the simplest things to be grateful for, in any given moment, is ourselves  ~ all aspects of ourselves.  I shared with the kids that interestingly enough, I didn’t hear anyone offer gratitude for their hands or their feet or their eyes or their ears.  They giggled.  I don’t think they’ve ever thought about their bodies or themselves in that way before.  It was fun to place that notion in their consciousness and see them get it.

If nothing else, we have feet and legs that carry us through each day.  We have hands that can touch one another, that can help us communicate, like I am doing now, that can feed us, and dress us.  We have eyes that help us see all the beauty and majesty of this world and ears that help us hear ~ a melody, a voice, a whisper.  We have a nose that can smell nature’s gifts in all forms.  We have a heart and lungs that beat and breathe without us having to think about it.  We have these miraculous systems that keep us healthy and clean.  We are, each one of us, true miracles.

How often do you think about the miracle that you are walking around? 

I asked the kids what they thought it would feel like to start each day saying thank you to some part of their body?  They giggled again.  I think it would be amazing.  What would it be like, if every time a thought came into your consciousness about what you lack, you took a second and offered gratitude for even being able to have that thought….for the awareness that you are alive in this moment……

During this time of year, when we are honoring those that we love with time, gifts, whatever, I encourage you to honor yourself in some small way.  Know that everyday a miracle is taking place inside of you!  Honor that.  Acknowledge it.  Own it.  Love it!

This is a glorious season filled with wonder, magic, and miracles.  Ohhh and the lights are one of my favorite things ~ on the buildings, in the streets, in the store windows, on the candles of the menorahs.  My heart wells up with joy at the celebration of life!  We are Beings of Light!  How amazing it is to have that reminder all around us!!!

My wish for each of you is that you behold your own radiance as you take in the beauty of the lights that surround you; that you know yourself as a miracle; that you love yourself just for Being and that you experience that loving from others as well as for them.

May the Blessings abound and may you know them to be here already!!!

~Perfect Vulnerability ~

The phrase “perfect vulnerability” has been coming into my consciousness for the past few weeks.  It is a phrase I have heard my teacher share with us from time to time.  I am not sure that I totally understood its meaning when I heard it first.  Truthfully, I am still working with it inside my consciousness today.

Last week, I watched a Ted talk on the internet.   This woman who called herself a researcher/storyteller was studying people’s way of being ~ why were some people able to be positive and move through life with more ease while other people seem to have a much more challenging time in this life ~ maybe to simplify ~ what was it that made people see the glass as half full vs. half empty.  The one consistent measure she found in her research was that people who were happier, who lived their life more optimistically were people who were willing to be vulnerable ~ people who knew their own worth and therefore had the freedom to share themselves truthfully ~ without having to put on a show for anyone or anything.  Why?  Because they knew their own worth, because on a cellular level, they knew that no one outside of them could touch their sense of worthiness.  This knowing gave them the willingness to share themselves with the world ~ and by doing so, they saw things for what they were; they wholly gave and received of themselves and others; and they lived with more freedom and lightness for not having to carry stuff around.

I sit here with tears in my eyes as I am writing this today.  I just found out this morning that a fellow classmate of mine, committed suicide yesterday.  The news was and still is a shock to me.  I had just seen him a few weeks ago and he looked wonderful.

Yesterday, I was watching an interview that Oprah did with Portia de Rossi ~ it was all about how much she had been suffering in her life and how “sick” she was mentally and physically.  Here we would see her on TV and think, “what a beautiful woman” not having any idea what was going on inside of her.  She put one face out to the world and suffered inside herself, alienated and alone.

I am hurting inside because I believe that this is rampant in our world ~ how we really feel about ourselves and what we show to the world quite often are very different.  And I believe that this applies to many of us on different levels ~ the way I show up with my clients isn’t always the way I show up in my everyday life.  The way I will accept someone no matter what they have to share with me, yet can’t do that for myself.  The way someone who may have gotten in a fight that morning, decided to hide her feelings and show up to work as if nothing is wrong…..    How many of us, hide parts of ourselves in order to “show face” the way we believe, really believe, others want us to be…..

Why is it so hard for us to be who we are, to share with perfect vulnerability?  I could answer that question with many answers ~ because we are judged, because others have expectations of us that we need to meet, because, because because ~ and what is the most important answer, because we don’t know, truly know, our own worth and we believe it will come from outside of us.  If we just act the “right” way, or dress the “right” way or eat the “right” way…. Who made up what is “right” and what is “wrong” that we hold our worth up to????   It is epidemic.

OK – I realize I’m getting a little melodramatic here – and my ego is coming in to make a point – thank you ego – but it’s not my ego I’m looking to on this – it’s my heart.

Somewhere inside every one of us is a part of ourselves that does know our worth.  The way to get there is through loving.

One of the things that Portia shared in her interview is that “love saved me.”

Love is very, very powerful!   My opportunity here is to become more kind, more gentle with myself so that I can be this way for others.   My opportunity is to share how I feel more truthfully.  I know it’s easy to say and not always so easy to do ~ but maybe if more of us consciously share from our hearts, we can make it safer for others to do so as well.

We are not responsible for what others choose for themselves in this life.  Of this, I am sure.  But, change begins with me!  And, my intention is to become more kind and gentle, to allow my vulnerabilities to show and to get to a place so that I know that I am worthy of love and kindness not only from others but from/for myself, no matter what.

My intention is to find that place inside of me that knows on a daily basis and to sit with it ~ to allow that part of me to love all the rest of me.  It’s there, in my heart, all of the time, in every moment.

My intention is to use my friend’s passing as a way to look even more deeply at the parts inside that I shun or look away from and give them space to be ~ to know that I am worthy of love no matter how I may show up ~ and to know that so is every one else!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God Bless you, my friend.  May your spirit know peace and know itself whole!

I am grateful to all of you for being in my life – for sharing yourselves with me so openly and for mirroring to me, my own radiance.

~ Asking for what you want~

Asking for what you want can often times be very challenging.  For me, what I found to be challenging about it was the possibility of asking and having someone say “no.”  I have realized through my own processing and growth work, that I used to take someone saying “no” to me as a rejection of me ~ that somehow, I must have done something wrong, or possibly that there was something inherently wrong with me.  To take it one step deeper, there was a part of me that believed that if someone said “no” to me, they were rejecting my very being and therefore, I felt unworthy.  This fear kept me from asking for what I wanted for many, many years.

A few years ago, I did an equestrian workshop in Tucson, AZ.  The purpose of the workshop was to assist us in bringing more conscious awareness to ourselves and how we showed up in the world.  We were taught that the horses would mirror our energy right back to us, giving us the opportunity to reflect on ourselves and areas that we could work on within ourselves.  The task we were asked to do was simple, walk up to the horse and get it to lift up its front leg so that we could clean it.  

I tried and tried but I could not get that horse to lift up her leg.  The leader came up to me and asked me what was going on.  He asked me if, in my life, I could empower myself to ask for what I wanted knowing that I was totally worthy of asking the question.  With tears rolling down my face, I said “no.”  He looked at me with such empathy as we talked about it.  He was helping me to understand that I could ask without being attached to the answer.  He said, “if you asked me to go out and get you the paper, I could say ‘yes’or I could say ‘no’ and neither would have anything to do with you.  It would have to do with me and what I was feeling like inside of myself at that moment.” 

He was assisting me in healing the part inside that was afraid of a “no” answer because I would take that “no” as rejection of my very Being.  He was giving me the dignity of my process while asking if I could give another the dignity of their process.

In that moment, I really heard him and understood that if I ask for what I want, whether I get it or not, depends upon where the person who is answering me is inside of themselves and actually has nothing to do with me whatsoever.

Most of us grow up believing that the outer world, or people outside of ourselves have the power to determine our worth.  We may think that if people say “yes” to us, we are more worthy than if they were say “no” to us.  We are rarely taught how to empower ourselves, to love ourselves and to know that our own worth comes from within our own hearts and is an inherent part of our Being.

Going through my Masters program at USM (University of Santa Monica) one of the first things we learned was that we are responsible for ourselves, our behavior, our reactions, our actions, our words, our emotions, etc.  With responsibility comes the opportunity to work our process, growth, freedom of choice as well as empowerment.  When I stop blaming the world or holding others responsible for who I am, I begin to know my own worth, feel myself as whole and thus honor myself and my needs.   

One way to honor myself is to be willing to ask for what I want without attachment to the outcome.  There is something very liberating in really understanding this. 

So, the next time you feel yourself wanting to ask for something, be it assistance, a hug, some advice, a loan, to borrow something, a lunch date, etc., know that you are worthy of the asking!!!!  Empower yourself by honoring who you are and releasing any attachment to the outcome. 

By the way, the angels are reminding me to tell you that they LOVE when you ask them for things.  They are always happy to be of assistance.  So ask away and know that they are always answering you!

And what they are telling me now is that sometimes a “NO” is a gift that we can’t see or understand in the moment!!!! 

~ Noise ~

Thursday morning is “gardener morning in my neighborhood.”  The sound of leaf blowers and lawn mowers can be heard one after another down the block.  Add to that the sound of dogs barking at the gardeners and you have noise.  I was frustrated as I sat down to meditate this morning amongst all of this noise ~ intending to uplift from it, to go to another place yet found myself distracted by it and then began to laugh. 

If outer reality is a reflection of inner reality ~ what about the noise was really disturbing?   Was it the noise itself, or was it the noise in my own mind that I was creating as thoughts looped around in my mind about how I wish it would stop or what things I needed to get done during the day and how I could be spending time doing this or that or how hard of a time I was having meditating…..

There is the noise we hear with our ears that exists outside of us and there is the noise that no one else can hear but us that is roaring loudly in our own minds.  Where does that noise come from?  What is its purpose?  Can we escape the noise we create within ourselves?

As I am sitting here typing away, asking for the words to flow through me, I find myself completely distracted by the noise in my head ~”write this, say that, no, not that, that doesn’t make sense, no they won’t understand that you need to change it, etc.”  It can be so distressing and I have stopped several times not knowing how to proceed; I have erased and re-written to the point where I finally stopped myself and sat still.  In that moment, what came is “just write what your mind is thinking, or saying to you.”  So, I did and it helped clear it. 

Sometimes we just need to give space to all of these thoughts rather than resist them.  There is a simple but profound quote that says “what you resist, persists.”  As I was resisting these thoughts, telling them to stop, to go away so I could concentrate, they just got louder.  As soon as I let them out on paper, the thoughts stopped and the flow began. 

This is such a beautiful metaphor for life.  How many things do we resist in our lives?  How often do we tell ourselves to stop doing this or stop thinking that or push things under the rug so to speak rather than just airing it out.  When we choose to take responsibility for ourselves, our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, etc. we empower ourselves to work with them and ultimately free ourselves from them.  Sometimes that means just allowing them to be ~ without judgment ~ through acknowledgement or the action of writing to release.  There are two ways to do this.  One I call a “mind dump” and the other is “Free Form Writing.”

There is a difference between doing a “mind dump” and this process called “Free Form Writing.”  A mind dump is just a way to clear our minds of thoughts that are distracting us from moving ahead on something.  Free Form writing is a tool that we use when we have some heavy duty emotions or judgments lodged in our psyche that need to be released.  It is an extremely potent tool and one which needs to be done with clear intention and ritual. 

A mind dump is great when you feel stuck mentally and just want to get those thoughts out so you can re-focus yourself to your task.  If this is the case, take a piece of paper out and allow yourself to write what is in your mind ~ without reading it or thinking about it ~ just letting whatever is there come out.   There is no reason to read it back, just write it out and let it go.  If you find that some great ideas are coming through as you go, use a different piece of paper for that so you can refer back to that one later.  If the dump consists of random thoughts that don’t have much energy to them, just throw it away. 

Free Form writing is a very powerful process that assists one in releasing emotionally charged energy.  It requires a bit more explanation and if it is something you are interested in, please contact me and we can discuss it further. 

The essence of what I am saying here is that honoring ourselves, every aspect of ourselves, which includes things about ourselves that we may want to resist or ignore as well as the things we like about ourselves is very important.  Everything serves our growth and learning.  So, the next time you find yourself resisting, give it voice, allow it to be without putting too much importance on it and see if it clears your way a bit.

It has worked wonders for me in all aspects of my life!!!

                  Y  Sabrina

Sacred Moments ~ E value ~

I take my dogs on a daily morning walk.  It is one of my favorite times of the day ~ me, my dogs and nature.  I realize that walking them is just as much a service to me as it is to them as it is a quiet time of reflection and meditation.

This morning I was reflecting on how I’ve been feeling the past few days which is a bit down.  I believe it partially has to do with transitioning the kids and myself to a new schedule but also because I find myself with time on my hands and basing my value, or how I feel about myself, on what I do or don’t do throughout the day.

We live in a society that places a great deal of value upon what we do and the things we accomplish or can say we accomplished throughout our day.  Many people measure success and, in turn, feel good about themselves when they are able to look back and say “I did this,” or “I am responsible for that,” or “I got acknowledged for getting a lot of things done today, this week, this year, this life, etc.”

So many of us seem to evaluate our worth based upon what we can check off on a “to do” list and/or what we get recognized/acknowledge for by others.  I find that when I allow this to be the measurement of my success, I feel empty and sad inside ~ why, because I am looking outside of myself for validation, acknowledgement, empowerment and I’m basing it on what I’ve done or haven’t done. 

What if at the end of the day, instead of evaluating or defining the success of the day/week/month/year/life, I reflected on how I showed up for the day ~ how I treated myself and others ~ how I connected to my inner wisdom or how connected I was to my gratitude and joy?

It seems to me that I would feel full inside and more grateful if I looked at my day, week, etc. from that place.  It seems that I would be empowered because then the acknowledgement and praise would come from inside myself and I need look no farther. 

As soon as I realized I was holding a belief inside myself that my value/worth was based upon what I could say I did that day, I was free of it.  I realized that I had an opportunity to shift that belief to the truth which is that my innate worth and value has nothing to do with what I’ve done and everything to do with who I am.

That is not to say that getting things done doesn’t fill me with a sense of accomplishment because it does ~ but the opportunity in this for me is to realize that I am just as valuable even if I don’t get anything done. 

As I wrote this last sentence it sounded so awkward to me.  Hmmmm…… I realize it’s because I am communicating about the heart through the mind.  This is the game the mind or ego likes to play on us.  Ha ha – the jokes on me.  The ego is the part of me that is evaluating me all of the time and deciding whether I come up short or successful.  My heart or soul loves and accepts and knows my value no matter what I do.  It knows the truth which is I am valuable/worthy just because I am.

So, what is the lesson here….whenever I find myself evaluating my worth, my value, my success, I know that my ego is running my world.  In that, I have an opportunity to shift back to my heart and see myself from that place – a place that only sees, knows, and expresses truth and loving.

Awareness a Choice b Freedom

Sacred Moments ~ Renewal ~

I am in the midst of celebrating the Jewish New Year and Yom Kippur, the day of atonement.  It is a beautiful time of year for reflection.  A time to reflect upon the things that have served me and that I would like to take with me into this new year and what ways of being, beliefs, etc. don’t serve me any longer and therefore I would like to leave behind.

During this time of year, many people participate in a sacred ceremony called “Tashlich.”  It is a ceremony that needs to be done by a moving, flowing body of water.  I participated in this ceremony for the first time in my life last week and found it to be very moving.  For me, the metaphor of the ocean is what was most powerful ~ because it reminded me that even though we may want to let something go, the letting go process ebbs and flows just like the ocean does.  A way of being or a judgment doesn’t always go in one fell swoop but comes in and out of our consciousness over time until all the pieces of it get swept far enough away that it dissolves.    

During the ceremony, one takes a piece of bread or cracker and puts the energy of the thing they want to let go of into it and then casts it into the ocean ~ with the intention of releasing it.  However, if one pays attention, sometimes that piece of bread washes back up on shore.  Sometimes it starts to dissolve and a piece of it goes out into the depths of the ocean and a small piece of it comes back to shore. 

What is beautiful for me about this, is that we are given the opportunity to look at where what we want to let go of may still be showing up in our lives in order to work with it and release it once more.  Each time, bringing our awareness to how much we have already grown since first releasing it and grateful for the opportunity to continue growing.

Nothing in life is black and white.  We are beings that are constantly evolving, creating and growing but we can only effect our growth when we are aware of how we are living our lives and how we would like it to be different.  The beauty in this time of year is that it gives us an opportunity to experience freedom of choice.  Why, because if we choose to reflect upon our lives and the way we show up to it, we awaken.  In so doing, we open up to receive ourselves ~ all aspects of ourselves and once aware we have choice ~ choice of what to renew, of what to open up to and choice of what to work to release.    

Choice is empowering as we begin to realize that in any given moment, we can evaluate with gentle, loving, kindness where we find ourselves and where we’d like to be.  We are given the opportunity to work with the pieces that flow back into our lives as well as celebrate the pieces that have fully been released.

I, for one, am very grateful for the continued awakening I experience on a daily basis.  The more awake I am, the more I can shine and share the radiance of my being with others.  Each day, or each year, whichever works for you, is a beautiful opportunity for you to come home to your own loving essence ~ layer by layer.

Know that I wish you all abundant blessings of self discovery and awakening throughout the coming year and that you feel the presence of your own loving bathe every cell of your being!

Namaste ~  Sabrina

Sacred Moments ~ Cycles~

To everything there is a season. 

I have been thinking about cycles a lot lately.  Cycles of life are ever present in our lives.  Every time we begin or end something a cycle begins or comes to an end.  Starting our day, making a meal, putting together a business deal, reading a story, running an errand, seeing a child off to college, all can be experienced as a cycle with a beginning and an ending. 

But cycles are more than just a beginning and an ending.  They are also about nurturing, expanding and letting go.  If one thinks about the seasons – Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall – what does each one represent and how do we find these seasons appearing in our everyday lives?

Winter is about death and renewal ~ it’s about tilling the soil to prepare for what is new to come.

Spring is about planting and visioning ~ it’s a time of putting ideas, thoughts, wants out there and letting go of them.

Summer is about nurturing and expanding ~ it’s about taking care of the ideas we’ve put into play without attachment to what happens.

Fall is about harvesting, collecting and celebrating that which has come to fruition ~ it’s about being grateful for what has come full circle even if it wasn’t exactly what we had planned it to be.

So often when we plan something, we do it with an expectation that things will turn out the way we want them to, and if they don’t we blame ourselves or others involved.   We think that what is, is somehow wrong or that we failed in some way.  We are rarely willing to see the gifts in what is if it’s not what we wanted it to be. 

Someone once said, “if you want to see God laugh, tell him/her your plans.” J

Many of us rarely realize that we are in a co-creative process here.  That ultimately we don’t have control over anything even though we’d like to think we do.  We are in partnership with something greater than ourselves and when we come to this awareness there is a sense of liberation that comes with that.

When I pay attention to the events and the experiences happening in my life as cyclical, it puts things in perspective for me.  Nothing stays the same, we, as all life, are constantly changing and evolving.  Our best laid plans take a life of their own.

So what is the opportunity here?  For me, it is about surrendering to the cycles of life.  It is about visioning and nurturing and cultivating and ultimately letting go and accepting what comes.  When a farmer plants his/her seeds in the spring – they hope for a full harvest but have no control over the weather that year, over the conditions of the soil, over insects etc.  They do what they can do and give the rest up to God or Spirit or Source.  How can we learn to vision, to plant, to nurture and to harvest without control or attachment?  How will that free up our energy and give us more room to breathe, to trust, to accept things as they are?  How does that help us celebrate what does come to fruition even if the end result is different from what we envisioned it to be?    

There is a phrase I use whenever I plan or ask for something – it is “this or something better for the highest good of all concerned.”  This affirms inside of me that I am in a co-creative process and that I will do my part and let go of the rest trusting that even if the end result is different than what I wanted, it is for my highest good.  It helps me realize that most often I ask for things based on my perspective, but when I am in partnership with Source, I receive the benefit of its higher perspective and know that it is always giving me opportunities to grow, expand and uplift into the best me I can be no matter what.

I know that this may be a new idea for many.  I offer it as something to consider, to feel into and to attune to how it might benefit you on your life’s journey.  Remember, inside your heart, you know yourself best and know what works for you as you walk this ever changing path.

Namaste ~  Sabrina

Sacred Moments ~ The Universal Web ~

Imagine that you are sitting in front of a spider web.  Imagine the web in your mind’s eye.    Really take it in, its size, its design, its intricacy, taking the time to appreciate the workmanship and the presence that has created this magnificent thing.  Now, go to its center.  Feel what it would feel like to be at the center of this web with all of these beautiful lines of energy emanating from your core, connecting you to all things.  Take a deep breath in this place.  Take another.  And another.

What do you feel?

We are, all of us, interconnected whether we are consciously aware of it or not.  On the physical realm, we are connected by thoughts, emotions, relationships, television, computers, telephones, etc.  In other realms or dimensions, we are connected through what I imagine to be intricate lines of energy ~ kind of like a spider’s web.    Although we may not see or experience a connection in this way with our physical eyes, it is there.

When you close your eyes and breathe into this image, my guess is that you may feel this sacred connection to all things.  It may bring you a moment of peace.  You may feel supported in a way that you haven’t before.  You may feel whole.  All because you were willing to take a moment and consciously breathe into this image.

When I take the time to connect in this way, be it through an image, a song, a meditation, I feel a universal oneness, a connectedness to all things.  It’s not something I can explain or rationalize~ but something I feel in every cell of myself.

In this physical world, we tend to seek connection first and foremost outside of ourselves.  Rarely do we go inside ~ and I would venture that’s because many of us have forgotten that within lies the richness of our divinity as we are connected to all things. 

We have created this amazing device called the world wide web which enables us to connect anytime to anyone, anywhere in the world.  There is no reason to be lonely when there is always something or someone to talk to through your computer, right?  However, I have found this time in our evolution a time of great loneliness where feelings of separation abound.  Don’t get me wrong, the internet is an amazingly wonderful tool.  However, does it satisfy what many people are longing for ~  true connection?

What do you feel like when you are truly connected to another?  Do you know?  Have you had that experience? 

For me, when I am truly connected I feel a deep sense of peace and serenity and joy in my heart.  I have found that the more I connect to my divine nature which resides inside of me, the more I am able to see and experience and connect with that in others around me as well as to all the Beings of Light that exist multi-dimensionally and are here to help remind us of who we are.

As I work with the image of the web, I see myself connected to all things in all directions of time and space.  I feel the presence of my higher self, my angels, my guides and ancestors.  I know that when I consciously focus my attention inwardly, I am met with love and feel myself as whole.   

In wholeness there is no lack, no loneliness, no separation ~ only abundance and gratitude.

For me this is an ongoing practice ~ a matter of consciously choosing into this place on a daily basis and sometimes several times a day. 

I invite you to join me.  Find an image or song or practice that inspires you to go to this place inside of yourself as you cherish the preciousness of who you are and your connection to all things.

Namaste ~ Sabrina

Sacred Moments ~ Our Essential Core ~

I just love being present for ordinary moments.  When I am gifted with an insight or an epiphany through an “ordinary” experience, thought or action, it is so sweet!!!   How wonderful that we are experiencing ordinary moments all day long!!!  What would happen if you were to stop and pay attention to an ordinary moment?  What magic might reveal itself to you?

This morning I was cutting open a grapefruit, one of my favorite fruits to begin my day with.  I was looking at its center and the thought came to me that even fruit has a core.  Hmmm…  In the core of a piece of fruit, exists all of its possibilities, its essence and the seeds to create new life.  It is what it is because of its core. 

We have a core as well.  We have a physical core which many of us tend to nurture through physical activity, like Pilates, abs work etc.  We are aware of the importance of keeping it strong so that physically we are aligned and able to walk through this world straight and fit.  We also have an energetic core that could be considered the spiritual or essential core of who we are as Divine Human Beings.  But how often do we think about this part of ourselves, and where does it exist?  Is the core of who we are something we can see, feel, touch, or experience?   

Some people say that the essence of who we are is in our mind.   Others say it is in our heart.  What do you believe?  Do you feel that the core essence of who you are lies in your physical form or beyond that?  Is it something you have access to?  Would you like to?  Do you believe you can?

I am not here to answer these questions but just to place them out there for your consideration.  I for one am a person who loves to seek and explore through questioning ~but then again, I realize that it’s not enough to find the answers to the questions mentally.  I need to experience the answers inside of myself to find what is true for me. 

Recently I did some work with an energy healer.  He asked me to hold his hands as he wanted to give me the experience of feeling Source.  Source to me is All That Is ~ what some people call God or Spirit or a higher consciousness. I knew intellectually what I believed it to be, but wasn’t sure I’d ever experienced it.   What I felt was Oneness ~ I couldn’t feel where he stopped and I began.  I couldn’t feel where my body met the chair I was sitting in.  Everything felt like it was part of the whole.  It was amazing.

What I realized in that moment was that the essence of who I am helps move me from knowing something to experiencing it.  And once I experience it, I know it to be truth.    We can learn things from reading or observing, but for me, the real learning takes place through experiencing what I have been taught, or what I have read.  Experiencing something gives me the opportunity to know whether it is true for me.  Some truths are universal.  Others are more personal!  It is so empowering to fully know/experience what is true for oneself as so often people are telling us what we should or should not believe.

So, play with this during ordinary moments.  Begin paying attention to how you feel the answers to questions or thoughts or even beliefs inside yourself.  When someone presents you with new information, before you take it to be true, feel into it and begin the exploration of yourself through your core.  The core of who you are is expansive, wise, joyful and loving.   It is always there, wherever you believe it to be, patiently and lovingly awaiting for you to consciously engage with it!

Sacred Moments ~ Exorcism” ~

I have been working with Archetypes throughout the past year.  An archetype is an ancient, universal pattern of behavior that is embedded in what Carl Jung called the “collective unconscious.”  To me, working with archetypes offers me a window into my own psyche and how I have developed pattern responses to situations.  As I learn more about different archetypes and work with them, I find the information to be extremely helpful and liberating as I have a frame of reference within which to work.

This morning, I received some information from someone that sat heavy on me.  And, as I mulled it over in my head, I found myself creating an entire negative future fantasy out of it.  Fortunately, I realized what I was doing and was able to stop myself and look at what was happening.  I went to my deck of Archetype cards and pulled one.  The one that came forward was Exorcist.  So perfect for what I was working with. 

When most of us here the word Exorcist we think of someone being possessed in a dark, evil way by something that needs to be removed.  We think that something from the outside, came inside of us and did something to make us behave a certain way……The Exorcist Card asks us to look at “freeing ourselves of destructive impulses.”

What if we went beyond that first impression and started to look at how certain beliefs, patterns of behavior or habits within our own minds affected how we lived our lives, thought our thoughts, acted or reacted…..

Working with archetypes is actually an amazing blessing because when we become aware of what is operating, we can work with it.  In other words, when this card came up for me, I was able to ask ~ how is the way I am reacting to this information destructive to myself?  Or on an even deeper level, what patterns of behavior, habits or ways of thinking within me are destructive to my way of being?  How do these things affect my quality of life?  Is there anything I can do about them?

The beauty of all of the questioning is that it takes these ways of being out of our “unconscious” and brings them into consciousness where we then have a CHOICE. 

When we “exorcise” something from ourselves, we take it out of the darkness and bring it into the light where we can then explore it, work to understand it and often times, let it go.  When this happens, any time we go into the pattern, habit or way of being, there is a part of us that says ~“here I go again ~ do I want to make a different choice or try a different way?”  This happens because NOW, we are awake to it!

Liberation comes when we become aware or awake to ourselves and the ways we show up to life rather than operating on automatic pilot, which many of us do.

There is nothing hiding in the darkness that once brought to light isn’t workable, forgivable, loveable, understandable….

It’s the fear of what is in the darkness that keeps it there, so many of us choose to close that door.  I understand that and have been there too.  However, I am aware that when we choose to let a little light in, our lives and our way of living, uplifts and we become forever changed.

So, I offer an invitation to you today, or any day to sit with the Exorcist Archetype and see what it has to share with you.

The beauty of ALL ARCHETYPES no matter whether they appear dark or light is that they have something to teach us if we are willing to meet them, and they are always NUETRAL.  It is our own judgment of them that makes them appear one way or the other. 

This is something to remember about life. 

Things are what they are! Only our fear, judgment, love or acceptance of them make them otherwise!!!

~ Exploring Change ~

I have a couple of Native American Fetishes that sit on my altar.  I was looking at them today and found one of them to be broken ~ the head had fallen off.  It was easy enough to put back together with glue ~ but it made me wonder ~ will the energy of it ever be the same?  And the next question came ~ are we ever the same after things happen to us in our lives? 

We face change every day.  In fact, “change is the only thing that remains constant in our lives.”  Our cells are changing, our thoughts are changing, our emotions change, even our energy changes from moment to moment ~ so are we ever really the same?  What does that even mean really?

If the truth is that in every moment we are changing ~ or some part of us is changing then every moment is a new moment, a new opportunity to participate in life in a different way.

That’s pretty awesome actually.  I don’t think that many of us are aware of this truth so are unable to honor it.  Instead, we tend to go about our days or even our moments in the same way.

I work with many people who feel that their lives are stagnant or stuck~ who are longing for something new.  Many of us are waiting for that “something new” to come from the outside.  Yet, something new is happening within us on one level or another in every moment. 

Change can come from something as simple as breaking a nail, to something bigger like the loss of a job or a loved one and everything in between.  It can come from watching a movie and having an epiphany about your life or from overhearing a conversation where someone says something that makes you see life or yourself in a different way.    However, when change does come in, it is often seen as an enemy rather than as a friend. 

So, the question is, do you see change as an enemy or as a friend?  Does your answer change if you feel that change was forced upon you rather than chosen by you?

If change is constant and we are dealing with it every day, would a shift in perspective about it help us move through it?  The choice comes forward when we become consciously aware that either way, change has brought us an opportunity.

What does change really offer us?  It offers a new way to process information.  It opens us to new perspectives.  It helps us be more compassionate with one another.  It pushes us forward to find that which brings us true joy.  It begs us to turn inside ourselves, to our own wisdom to find comfort as well as information/guidance.   It asks us to start living our lives from the inside out, rather than from the outside in.

When I go inside myself to reflect, to find comfort, I find the one and only thing that is constant in this world and that is the essence of who I am - LOVE.  If change, pushes me to go back to that place inside and REMEMBER who I am, then I am forever grateful for it!

  Y  Sabrina

~ Gifts from God ~

I am home, recovering from my hysterectomy and grateful to be alive!    Sitting in my backyard, as I can’t yet go very far, enjoying the sun on my face and the love I’m receiving from my two dogs who haven’t left my side since I got home. 

Life brings us each so many different kinds of experiences.  Most often, while we are navigating through them, we don’t know why they are here and often get stuck in the wondering of why.  When I first found out I needed to have this surgery, I remember asking myself what I did “wrong” to deserve this.  I went through what most of us go through when we receive unexpected news about ourselves or a loved one.  And, it is so important that we allow ourselves to ask these questions and give ourselves the dignity of our process which may run from anger to frustration to depression to resistance and finally into surrender and acceptance.    

I have found time and time again, that if I allow myself all of my feelings, and they come and go like waves, that I eventually get to a place of acceptance.  Once in the place of acceptance, I am able to look at my situation from a different, or higher perspective, and open to the gifts that it brings ~ for in truth, every experience or situation offers with it Gifts from God or Spirit or the Universe, or All That Is (whichever you feel more comfortable with). 

I  remember a quote I read while I was going through this.  It said something like:   “How would your relationship to an issue be different if instead of asking ‘Why is this happening to me?’ you started asking, ‘In what ways might this be happening for me?’   How would life look different if we saw all of our experiences ~ the most beautiful as well as the most painful ~ as part of an ongoing conversation, between ourselves and the sacred energies of life that are continually leading us in the direction of our greatest good, both personally and collectively?”

So I sat with that question which really helped lift me up and out of a victim mentality and into an empowered one.  I started asking that question and working with it.  I began the conversation with my body and with Spirit and listened in the silence.  It was profoundly healing and I received information and love unlike anything I’d ever known. 

Today, as I reflect upon the past few months, I find myself in deep gratitude for the gifts I have received through this hysterectomy.  I am sharing myself more fully.  I am honoring the power and wisdom of my body.  I am in deeper communion with Spirit and with my connection to All That Is.  I have made new friends and opened to new pathways.  I wrote to one friend this morning, that if going through this process was just to meet her then it was worth it – and I truly mean that.  I may not have met her, nor have grown such a sacred connection with her, had this not brought us together.  So, she is one of the many gifts I received through this process. 

I know, in all of my Being, that allowing myself to grieve and to have my tears and my anger and then move into a place of acceptance and love opened me to receive fully all the gifts that have been pouring down on me.  The truth is, there are Gifts from God in everything, when we move out of our own way and allow.  May you continue this conversation in your own life, with your own self and open to receive all that is awaiting you.  Know you are loved beyond measure and the gifts are in abundance all around you!

Thank you all for your prayers and blessings.  I am ever grateful!   

Y  Sabrina

~ Opening to Receive ~

“It is in giving that we receive.” ~ St. Francis of Assisi

Imagine for a moment that there are two planets in existence that a person could live on.  One was a giving planet, the other was a receiving planet.  If you were given a choice of where you wanted to live, which would you choose and why?

Do you think of yourself as a giver?  Is it better to be a giver than a receiver?  How do you define generosity?  Is it solely in the giving, or is it also in the receiving? 

I had an experience a few years ago, where I was in deep gratitude to someone for something she offered me.  It was during a dance class that I was taking.  I went to her and looked at her and put my hands in prayer pose and said thank you.  My eyes welled up with tears of gratitude.  She stood there with her hands in prayer pose and looked straight into my eyes and received my gratitude.  She held my gaze for what seemed like eternity and fully took in the gratitude that I was offering.  I had never before experienced someone receiving in that profound way and it changed my life!

It made me start to think more about receiving.  Truly, in that moment of giving and receiving, I couldn’t feel the difference.  I was so filled with gratitude and at the same time, so totally elated that she was receiving it ~ which I felt was another gift she was giving me.  So, in giving and receiving, where does one end and another begin?

In the past, I have been someone who gives more often than receives.  I’ve received by giving a hug or a “thank you.”  However, this experience taught me, that in receiving, I am truly honoring another’s gesture of giving.  I am honoring that a person took the time to do something or buy something or share something with me in their heart.  When someone offers me something and I say “no, really I don’t need it, or you keep it, or no thank you, I deny them the gift of their giving. 

I am about to undergo a hysterectomy.  Throughout this process, I have been given the opportunity to receive ~ to receive support, prayers, meals, love, etc.  I have had people coming to my home to do energy work and prayer communion and have opened myself to receive in a way I’ve never done before.  I am amazed at how generous people are, with their time, with their hearts, with their love.  In fact, I wasn’t aware that this level of generosity and service was available to me, or to anyone for that matter.  It is!!  And, I am experiencing it, because I am choosing to!   I am learning that just as I can choose to give, I can choose to receive!    I’m learning that when someone chooses to give, that my receiving, makes that giving a gift for us both.

I am filled with gratitude that through my life experiences, I have opened me to an even greater degree to receiving.  And, in receiving, I find myself wanting to offer my heart and my love in service to others through giving.

So, if I had to choose which planet I would want to live on, I would make sure that there was a bridge that connected both of them, so I could go back and forth and if there wasn’t, I would find a way to build one J

~Emerging~

Here I am.  Sitting at my computer writing my first entry, my first “notes,” my first share….  This is something I have been longing to do for quite some time ~ not knowing how to begin, not feeling courageous enough to put myself out there, getting stuck somewhere in the land of “I don’t know” or “no one will be interested.”  Nevertheless, here I am.  Ready to share what wants to express through me; not attached to that illusionary land and following my heart.

My heart wants me to share.  Share in any way that wants to come forward in the moment I sit down to do so.  Not planning anything or trying to figure it out, but just showing up and allowing.  As I sat in meditation this morning, I asked what wanted to come forward.  I got the idea to pick an angel card and share whatever wanted to come through it.  I loved the idea!  So, I sat with the deck this morning and out popped the card ~ Emerging ~   How perfect!!! ~ for here I am emerging out of my cocoon and offering my radiance, wisdom and loving out to you.

I often wonder if one emerges slowly or in a burst of energy just like that.  Maybe for each one of us, it’s different.  When I reflect on what has brought me to this moment, it has been a series of events, a series of processes and deep listening.  It has been many days and many nights of wondering, of sitting in the dark and the light inside myself deciding whether or not to…… And then, here I am.  I have emerged.  I am courageously sharing myself.   I had this sense that today was the day.   Honestly, it doesn’t really matter how long it has taken or when it began, because NOW is the only moment.    Emerging happens many times in a lifetime.  We may emerge from a relationship, from a pattern of behavior, from a job or a creative endeavor.  What does emerging mean to you?  What might you be emerging from in this current phase of your life?

When I look at the card itself, and feel into the energy of it, what I find in it is a tentativeness, a wondering – should I or shouldn’t I?  Is it time yet?  Maybe I’ll wait until I’m sure….  The flowers beneath her have blossomed, yet her wings are not fully unfolded.  It seems she is looking outside of herself for confirmation, for encouragement.  And I offer the question to you – what are you waiting for?  What is holding you back?  Is it fear or doubt or uncertainty?  Are you still wondering what it is you are emerging from or into for that matter?  Do you know inside your heart that you are a magical, radiant, Divine Being with unique gifts to share with the world?  YOU ARE!!! 

Attune.  Deepen in your knowing.  Feel the light inside your heart and allow it to lead you forward.  Know that you are loved beyond measure, fully supported and celebrated in every moment.   Allow grace to shine upon you trusting that wherever you are is perfect even though it may not feel so.

~ Exploring “I don’t know” ~

When I was a little girl, my father used to get very angry with me when I would answer any question he would ask me with the response “I don’t know.”  He used to poke me in my heart chakra over and over saying “I don’t know is not an answer.”   It wasn’t until recently, when I was working through something in my life, that I remembered that.  It was a big memory – one that I felt in all of my cells – and a beautiful opportunity for me to heal the hurt of it for the last time.  I realized that I answered many questions over the course of my life with “I don’t know.”  It’s really an interesting phrase to explore.  What does that really mean?  Are there times when I really don’t know what I want or what the answer is?  Are there times where I do know but am afraid to voice it?  And, if that’s the case, what’s behind the fear?  Is there a consequence for knowing? 

Sometimes, I do know very well and am afraid that if I voice that knowing, I will then have to follow it and that seems scary and often times bigger than myself.  Like, by putting it out there, I am now responsible to follow it.  What do you want to do with your life?  What is your life purpose?  What do you want for dinner?  Do you want to be in a committed relationship?  Do you want continue working with me?  How can I be of assistance to you?  Do you want to go to the party or stay home?

Does answering a question with “I don’t know” give away your power?  Is that your intention?  Are you even aware of it?  

Is there any time where it is ok to answer that way?  What comes forward for me when writing this is that when we answer something, we are affirming ourselves – affirming our desires, needs, wants, choices, etc.  Is the answer of “I don’t know” tied into unworthiness – like somehow unconsciously I am unworthy of truly asking for what I want?

So many of us walk through life unconsciously feeling unworthy.  We are worthy because we are Divine Beings who have chosen into this human experience. We are worthy because we are!  As each one of us awakens to this TRUTH, my sense is that we will find a way to affirm ourselves by answering what is truly in our heart.    

My philosophy about life is that when I bring my awareness to something, even something as habitual as answering questions with “I don’t know”, that now I have the freedom to choose a different answer – because maybe in the past, it was unconscious and now it is conscious.  Now, I can hear myself answer I don’t know and check inside – is that the truth???  Maybe in this situation, it is.  Maybe I won’t know until I get there is another way of answering.  Maybe, it’s I will follow my heart and make my choices/decisions as they come forward rather than projecting out into the future or fantasizing about what may or may not happen…  Maybe it is simply, tuning in and listening and honoring what we want in that moment and feeling the freedom that comes with expressing that want, the liberation that comes from affirming oneself.

~ Children ~

In my meditation today, the energy of yesterday’s community circle came to me.  I am sitting in circle with first and second graders at my son’s elementary school as part of my service project.   We sit in circle to learn how to share and listen to one another, to learn about community.  There is a powerful Community Circle motto that I taught the children – it goes like this.  Together we can discuss our choices.  Together we can make wise decisions.  Together we can share our feelings.  Together we can be part of the solution, and create a safe environment for all to learn, to grow and to thrive!  Such simple words, yet so powerful to internalize!  Imagine what this world would be like, if we could live by this motto?! These radiant children love saying and it is so uplifting to hear them J

Yesterday, I taught them about solving circles.  A solving circle is when someone invites one of their classmates into the center of the circle to talk.  The friend needs to accept the invitation and if so, together they move to the center, while the others act as witnesses.  In the center they draw an imaginary circle around them to signify that this is a special place and time for them.  Then, the one who invited, begins.  I talked to them about the power of the “I” voice – meaning, speaking about how “I” feel rather than blaming another for one’s feelings.  The children were so courageous and willing to participate.  One by one, they would volunteer to invite a friend to the center.  They spoke so beautifully about how they were hurt by their friend’s behavior and their friends listened and often apologized.  Then they shook hands and went back to the outer circle. 

In one solving circle, the boy who was invited by the other sat with him and listened but kept saying that he didn’t do it.  This turned into such a beautiful teaching moment.  I talked to them about how it’s less important to apologize then to let your friend know that you hear him or her.  So I asked the boy to say “I hear you.”  He did and his friend was ok with that! 

Solving circles are not about saying sorry or admitting to something, they are about HONORING one another and HEARING one another.  Somehow, when we take the time to listen one-on-one it can be very healing!  In the end, what most of us really want is to be heard.  I have found that when someone says “I hear you” something relaxes inside of me.  I am not looking for someone to fix me or fix the situation but just to acknowledge that it is. 

The next time someone invites you into a conversation, or your children/husband/partner/friend come home upset or frustrated, try saying “I HEAR YOU” instead of attempting to fix or change the way they feel.  See how it makes you feel inside.